ananke's Diaryland Diary

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S&M withdrawl

So Im finding myself in a dilemma. I am a huge pain slut, a wonderful submissive.
The only thing is, Mike doesnt let me shine. I love him more than anything in the world, and I am more than willing to spend the rest of my days with him.
Its just frustrating not being able to feel his pain, his Dominance, his Sadism. I want to bend to Him, just one damn time.
Hes awesome with clamps and rope, and hes wonderful as far as letting me serve him.
Its just that he doesnt want to hurt me. I cant really blame him, seeing that when I left Eric, I was a total wreck. I didnt feel that I had any self worth, and hell, Eric would rather jerk off to porn that have sex with me.
So yea, Mike had his hands full when we finally decided to become a couple.
He knows that I have fantasies, and He knows what I like, and what I wont do.
I just wish Hed play with me.
The sex we do have is wonderful, and I wouldnt change it. He bites, scratches, all of that.
I just miss the pain of it all.
*sighs*

I just to be Dominated again.

7:43 p.m. - 2006-08-10

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